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  • Writer's pictureAlice Wyatt

Impure Love


orange, fluffy, adorable, and… feral

two feet away is as close

as one is allowed

“I saved your life, you little shit!”

I yell as he darts away

this is true, me saving his life

he doesn’t seem to remember

or care

every three hours




his emaciated little body

tight against my chest

kitten formula

drop by drop

trying to give him

a fighting chance

he drinks reluctantly

avoiding my eyes

never giving me

a single purr

for my troubles

as soon as he is strong enough

can hold his own

at his foster mother’s teat

he resists any touch

clearly stating his world

is not mine

orange, fluffy, adorable

he illuminates

a sliver of darkness

in my soul

impatience and ugliness

rise inside me

the rejection of this little cat

hits hard

where I am most vulnerable

somehow…. despite my best efforts

my love is not as pure

as I would wish

loving and not being loved back

how does one

steel one’s back

keep the chin up

take a deep breath

resolve to be the best

version of themselves

despite the actions

of another?

I continue to ponder this

with another name

in my heart

as this little orange cat

all grown up now

ignores my outstretched hand

darts under the fence

I shout after him

“I love you, you little shit!”

and begin to cry

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Heartbreaking lovely, Alice.

Meet another orange tabby... Caveman. Came to me as a wee kitten after living on the streets. A rascal start to finish. You can see it in this shot, one eye watching me, daring me to toast my bread. He's buried in the backyard of my previous home in Las Cruces. Lovepie and Artis are buried next to him.





It always took a couple of weeks for our ferals. Sometimes I think the vet visit for fixing takes its toll on how the cats regard us. 2 are as friendly as all get out. 2 have been very skittish (still) after a couple of years. Interestingly enough the skittish ones are the best hunters. Excellent prose Alice!



Sometimes an object of our love doesn't need as much adoring as we are willing to give. Back up a bit and just observe from a distance their magnificence and independence.

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